Now what? Starting over again… from the very beginning.

I’ve been following Alex Charfen for many years. One of his most informative measures of scale in business is called The Billionaire Code. It’s essentially a chart that visualizes scaling a business from “seeker” to creating a legacy business. Through it he walks the CEO of a business through the various phases of a business from income, staffing, constraints businesses and their CEO’s encounter along the way.

It’s the most detailed and comprehensive path to scale any business from an idea, to a hobby, to a real business and then to a legacy business.

When I owed my gym, I loved this resource as I scaled ‘the code.’ One aspect of it I found lacking was what to do then shit starts to go back the wrong way.

In business we are constantly looking to grow, because if you’re not growing you’re dying. It’s a universal truth in business. I found myself wrestling with a few things the last 18 months in my business:

1- I had fallen out of love with my work and wanted to embark on something new. Fitness is definitely a passion based business, because you have to pour your life into your clients, your team and every minute of everyday. I started to feel like when it came to living my life with my priorities in alignment- there was always something in the business that tore me away from my family, friends, sleep and self care. It went from a passion based business to daily drudgery, but being the boss I had to slap a smile on my face, show up everyday and inspire my team and my clients.

2- I noticed a profound shift in the market place and people’s desire to actually act to change. Everyone wants to get in shape and lose weight, but nobody actually wants to commit to a better way of living for health long term. My business became a churn factory- the more my team and I cared about each clients outcome- the fewer clients we had. Granted the clients we had were super committed- but a business needs repeat business to stay in business. Not the promise of repeat business, but the same 300-1000 customers each day, week and month. Without that a business can’t keep the lights on, the rent paid or their team and their teams families fed.

3- Social media and online reviews and presence do no equal income.

4- A business can experience their best year ever- followed rapidly with their worst year ever and bankruptcy. Don’t get cocky, remain humble, and always live beneath your means. Recognize the initial pinch and act quickly. It’s imperative if you want to continue to win in business.

I love being the boss.
I love being self employed.

I live having a team.

I love being the breadwinner and maintaining my independence.

So starting over, having spent my saving to keep my business afloat for the last 6 months of its life, is simply put HARD AS F$&@.

Not knowing what I want to do when I grow up, starting over and just exploring the world as I know and don’t know it. While keeping the lessons I’ve learned and forgetting just enough of the life and work I once knew so that I can open myself up to new lessons and opportunities.

The beauty of being a seeker again is the openness of what’s possible.

The shit bit of being a seeker again is all the uncertainty, and I rely heavily on having a level of certainty in my life.

So how do you handle being a seeker again, when you once had a pretty dang good thing and not even that long ago?

1- Ask yourself questions about what’s important to you in your work- ability to use creativity? Lead a team? Have free time? What kind of money do you want to make per unit? Do you want a service based business or product based business? How long will you give something a go before you decide it’s your next thing or if it’s not?
2- Evaluate what you really don’t want to experience again in your work life and personal life.
3- Get curious. About life, people, other businesses and try to find a need you can fill, and you want to fill that’s interesting enough to pursue.
4- Get busy. Be careful not to get sucked down into defeat and depression. Keep moving forward and recognize that there is beauty in the lessons you are learning and you won’t stay here as long as you keep moving forward. Do one thing each day that will move you forward, out of the middle- and be ok with your direction may change along the way. It’s ok.

Where is this whole thing going

I originally started this page, this blog and even this business as a way to coach and guide other women in business through the ebbs and flows of owning a growing business, mothering and living life. It felt divinely guided and just what I needed at the time. A break or perhaps an escape.

Maybe you can relate to the need to escape your own reality, and find yourself searching for a place to recreate yourself, your work or maybe just be you in a world that just pushes and drives and strives for more. More work, more money, more clients, more balance, more happiness, more healthy, more sexy, more.

It's exhausting, really. Trying to keep up. More often I think it is all in my head- that I am making my life, my reality harder than it needs to be. If it's in my head great! But then what do I do with it?

Accept it. Face it. Cry about it. Learn from it. Keep it in. Let it out. Figure it out. Let it be.

I think these are questions, and answers that most of us momma bosses are seeking. Because let's be real- nobody every showed us just how hard it was gonna be to have it all, or at the very least dare to strive for it all. Our mothers never told us that to be a mother, didn't mean we were nothing else. They did everything so selflessly for us, but I think purhaps they also forgot to show us their own humanity.

Did you too ever look at your mother as a robot, or this being sent to take care of you? Feed you? Drive you and your friends around? Scream at you? Clean the house? 

Up until about 9 years ago, I thought that was all it was to be a mother- you have no identity. Your life as a person is over. All your experiences involve your children from time time of conception to your time of death.

One day I woke up, and realized I was still alive, I still had goals, and ambitions that didn't include my children or my significant other . Things that I still wanted, that I was willing to do the work for to show up in this world, in this life- in a way that I felt would best honor my own creation.

I suppose this blog is just that, or at least the direction I want to take it. 

How to live a life you are proud of with all the hats we wear, and pull all the joy, the love, the laughter, the pain and the sorrow out of it that we can. To truly experience life on your terms- even with it sucks. lol. 

Maybe at some point I will have seminars, retreats, and get togethers. But for now I am just going to allow whatever is happening here happen. I won't force success, as I find myself so often doing. I just hope that this page, this blog, becomes by fierce cry out to the world and maybe just maybe makes your day just a little more exciting. 

Looking for something badass to help you create a live less stressed and more enjoyable check out my ebook The Balanced Momma Boss- it's free and really helpful if you feel like your life is in tatters.