Greed & Selfishness are Good

Growing up, I was raised in the Catholic church. I attended Catholic School.

On the mornings my mom would bring us to school, she would take my brothers and I to 6a morning mass and prayers. Typically my brothers and I would fall asleep in the the car, then again in the pews during mass, then be starving and rambunctious by the time mass was over and it was time to go to prayers.

Then off to school we would go, where every Thursday we would get a second dose of church when the entire school was ushered 2 blocks to Saint Mary’s Cathredral.

Religion, rituals, judgement, shame, and guilt were stuffed down my throat from a very early age.

As I grew up, I decided to unintentionally break mothers and a majority of my families hearts when I decided not to get confirmed in the Catholic church.

At 16 I became pregnant, and was swiftly introduced to the standard protocol for a young catholic pregnant girl. I was sent away to stay with my aunt, who had also been an young pregnant woman. I guess she was supposed to talk me into putting my child up for adoption, or educate me on what it was like to be an unwed mother.

When I got home from my aunts, I was handed pamphlets for “Girls Homes for Unwed Mothers," and shuffled around to more relatives, then taken to adoption agency where I was told to put my child up for adoption.

I wouldn’t.

Then it was decided I was an out of control teenager, and I was told by my parents, “If you are going to make adult decisions, then go be an adult.”

At 16 I was thrown out, and left to figure life out on my own. I was ok with it- mostly.

I was free.

What I didn’t realize would control much of my life, and my thinking over the next several years what everything I had been taught and told about myself.

The shame was still there.

The guilt was still there.

The feelings of never being enough.

The anger about being told I was the most selfish person alive, by many family members.

The frustration with my fathers obsession with money, and the expense of things.

I was free… but I wasn’t.

On my own, I set about a course of trying to right my life, and do what I thought was in the best interest of my child. So I married my son’s biological father, we went to Georgia (one of the few states in the country, where at the time you could get married underage if you are pregnant without parental consent.) The marriage was short lived.

I dropped out of school, got my GED, started classes at the local community college, got a job, and started saving money.

Within a year, my parents and I had reconciled- and I went to work for my Dad at his chain of pawnshops, once again doing what I was supposed to do, learn the family business.

………..

I know what you are thinking, Sara are you going to get the point?

Yes, but i wanted you first to understand where I have come from, in order to understand where the remainder of this is going, especially with such a confrontational title of Greed & Selfishness are Good.

I know the bleeding heart will argue with me, and many will make valid points.

Onward.

……

Greed and selfishness are good- though that is not how I was raised to think.

I was taught to take care of others first, do what’s best for others first, don’t worry about your own needs.

Society uses phrases like,"you are all about the money,” “you are so selfish” “you are so greedy” as insults, and put downs.

If you believe selfishness is a bad thing, when someone insults you by telling you are selfish- it cuts deep, and makes you feel like a terrible person

If you believe greed is a bad thing, when someone tells you that you are “all about the money” it makes you not want to pursue money or wealth.

Here’s the thing though, if you are not willing to take care of yourself, and do what’s in your best interest, you can’t effectively take care of others or do what’s in their best interest without inserting your own expectations for how your good deeds with serve you.

Same with greed and money. Wanting to make, save, protect and keep what is yours what you have earned is not a bad thing- it’s responsible. With money that has been hard fought for, and hard won, and hard kept you can change and transform the legacy of your family and of course yourself.

Everyone is greedy and selfish- and the people who sling selfishness and greed around like they are insults and the greediest and most selfish of them all, because somehow they feel like you owe them something. A cut of your hard earned money, or a piece of your soul.

It’s nutty when you stop to think about it.

Greed can appear in many forms, and it’s not something that only appears in the wealthiest of our society. I would argue- that the wealthiest among us are the least greedy- because with their money they can and most do effect more change by starting foundations, donating gobs of money to charities that mean something to them. If you have been to charity function- they are the ones writing checks that are larger than most peoples paychecks for a year. Tell me how that is greedy.

Greed appears when people think that they are entitled to what is yours.

Think of when someone wins the lottery, a lawsuit, or inherits a fair amount of money- it’s typically gone very quickly because- when you have money, or you have stuff, people will feel like you own them something which is true greed.

Then the beneficiary of the funds gives the money and things away, because they don’t want to be viewed as greedy or selfish.

Because as most people rationalize it- greed is bad.

If you have money you are greedy.

If you are greedy you are a bad person.

Money makes you a bad person.

Which must mean if you are broke- you are a good person, and you are selfless.

People who are selfless, care more about others than they care about themselves- somehow martyring themselves in the process.

If you are selfless you are a good person.

If you are selfless you will go to heaven

If you are selfless abundant blessings are waiting for you.

My friends, if you are selfless, you are probably a doormat, and depressed. You likely don’t know who you are, what matters to you, or what you have to offer the world. You seek to serve others because you will get some kind of karmic pay off.

Selfishness is one of those things that people throw out as an insult to somehow give themselves a moral high ground.

What if being selfish and owning that shit was actually self responsible?

What if being selfish, doing what’s best for you and your family was the most responsible and least damaging things you could do for society and yourself?

Any kind of desire to make money, provide for your family, take care of yourself were actually good.

What if greed was good.

What if selfishness was actually the better option?

What if the person spewing insults, was actually just another hurt person- trying to place their own hurts and sufferings onto you?

I know the negative hurtful thought processes of greed and selfishness and the pain associated with the insults of others and even the things we tell ourself about selfishness and greed- because I have worked relentlessly hard to understand the hook that these words have on me based off how I was raised.

I think the guilt and shame that comes with the impleccations of being told you are greedy, or being told you are selfish are far more damaging that the meanings of the words themselves.

They are words that are tossed around to people back in “their place” and to lower you to another level, that you were never meant to live and exist at.

If people want to accuse you of being greedy or selfish- note that they are the ones who are the most selfish and greedy - because they are angry about the fact that you can’t and won’t be controlled by the communal thinking.

It’s ok to exist on the fringes of creating, receiving, contributing and caring. At the end of the day- if you are not ok, your family is not ok, your business is not ok, chances are you are not ok.

The world need you to be ok, because you are here for big things, big contributions- so be selfish, be greedy and know it’s self responsible- and not actually a bad thing!

God didn’t create you to broke. God didn’t create you to be pathetic. God didn’t create you for any less that pursuing your greatest work in the world. It’s time to stop holding back because you are afraid of what people might think or say, because that is truly the greatest definition of greed and selfishness.

You weren’t meant to be contained or kept bottled up.

If you are ready to make a bigger difference to the world around and those you serve and you want to serve more people at your highest level, get my FREE High Ticket Sales Script Here.

If you are want to explore working with me on a private one on one capacity, click here to book a call.

The Purpose of Owning A Business

The fastest way to burn out with your business is to stop focusing and striving for this one thing, that I will get to in minute.

What is the purpose of owning and growing a business?

For most people, we start a business because we want to make money, make an impact and have freedom. Right? At least that’s why I have started each business I have owned.

For most people I think the biggest reason start a business though is freedom. Freedom to make as much or as little as you want to make. Freedom to work when you want to work, how you want to work and where you want to work.

Freedom to think, freedom to choose and freedom to decide.

But most entrepreneurs find themselves in a seemingly constant cycle of panic, abbreviated by sweet moments of success. The stats back it up 51% of small business owners have gone no less than 6 months without a paycheck at some point in their business, and almost 60% of small business owners make $50,000 or less per year.

So sure we get into business for money, impact and freedom but many only cage themselves into a prison they can never get out of.

I see a lot on social media, influencers, coaches and gurus who talk about how much they made in their last launch or last year, but you never hear about what their actual profits were. I don’t care if you did $1 Million dollars in sales last year if you had $800k in expenses.

A business is considered profitable when it makes money, after you the owner is paid, and all the bills are covered. If you have a team of people whom you support with a salary, but aren’t bringing home a salary yourself, you are doing something wrong. Plain and simple.

The purpose of a business for the business owner, is and always will be to make you money. PROFIT.

This means that if you can’t afford to hire someone without cutting your own salary, don’t hire that person, go it alone just a little while longer until you hit a number where you can afford to hire someone.

We must be diligent with managing our expenses in business, just because you think you can afford something, doesn’t mean you can. Just because you tell yourself your expenses are just you reinvesting in the business- doesn’t mean you actually are.

If your business is not profitable- do not spend any more and savagely cut expenses until you are profitable again.

Depending on the size of your organization truly dictates what your expenses should be, but cut cut cut, until you are paying yourself.

If you don’t take of yourself first you can’t take care of anyone else.

If the business can’t take care of you first, it can’t take care of anyone else.

A great resource for managing your expenses and finding more profit in your business is “Profit First” By Mike Michaelwicz. I wish I would have read it sooner, and you will wish you had too.

To get more of The Momma Boss follow us on social media at Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Youtube, and our podcast The Momma Boss with Sara Goossen where ever you get your podcasts.